Have you ever been so angry that hitting things felt good? Or so numb that you actually felt high? The past few years have been like that for me. Traveling between fury and indifference with no stops in between.
Some people hate me for it, while others are scared of me. But none of them can hurt me, because I don't care about anything or anyone.
I love her so much that I hate her. We used to be friends, but I found out that I couldn't trust her or anyone else.
So I hurt her. I pushed her away.
But I still need her. The sight of her centers me, and I can pool all of my anger into her. Engaging her, challenging her, bullying her...they are my food, my air, and the last part of me that feels anything human.
But she left. She went to France for a year, and came back a different girl.
Now, when I push, she pushes back.
I have been waiting for this book for a LONG TIME! I think that I asked about this about once a month until the ARC was ready for me to read. I LOVED Bully. I love the back and forth hate between Jared and Tate. I loved how you could tell that they really cared for each other, but they both had issues with the other and would just go at it back and forth. That is, until they finally decided that they were going to finally give in to their feelings and let love ride-and what a ride it was.
In Until You, we get Jared's take on all of this. I was pretty sure that we were going to get the typical poor me, I don't have a daddy BS that you get in other books. What we got instead was Jared actually fighting back to be the person that he was. He was loving and caring, and yea, a little screwed up, but for those that were willing to fight for him, you got his undivided devotion.
We got to see how Tate was not the girl that was not going to let her old friend be a bully and ruin her Senior year of high school. I know that I read about her fighting back in Bully, but in here it was more emotional seeing it from Jared's point of view. I really enjoyed watching their relationship grow and once it got to the sex- WOW OH WOW it was pretty hot! You knew it was going to happen with the hot headed messes that they were, but it was beyond my expectations.
I honestly wondered if this was going to be a typical his POV book with the same story as the original. While at times you know what is coming up, I have to say that I LOVED getting in Jared's head. I loved knowing what he was thinking and why he did what he did. I really enjoyed getting to know his relationship with his parents and his friends. I knew that him and KC had hooked up, but knowing why and what they were both feeling was interesting. His relationship with his brother and best friend Madoc were entertaining and makes me look forward to their books in the future.
How did she do that? How did she always manage to make me feel happy to see her happy?
I blinked long and hard.
Tate continued yapping to the dog. “Oh, well, I love you, too!” She sounded like she was speaking to a child, all sweet and shit, as Madman kept nudging and licking her face.
He shouldn’t love her this much. What had she done for him in the past two years?
“Madman, come,” I barked, not really angry with the dog.
Tate’s eyes shifted up to me, and she stood up. “You’re being a jerk to the dog now, too?” She scowled, and it was then that I noticed what she was wearing.
The Nine Inch Nails T-shirt I’d given her when we were fourteen, and my chest swelled for some stupid unknown reason.
I’d forgotten she had it.
Okay…not really. I guess I didn’t realize that she still had it.
She probably didn’t even remember that I’d given it to her.
Kneeling down to hook Madman’s leash onto his collar, I twisted my lips up slightly. “You’re talking again, Tatum.”
I didn’t call her Tate. She hated “Tatum”, so that’s what I called her.
I fixed a bored, superior expression on my face.
I’d be happier without her around, I told myself. She was nothing.
And yet, I heard the little voice in the back of my head. She was everything.
She shook her head, the hurt in her eyes clear as she turned to walk away.
She wasn’t fighting back, I guess. Not today. The party on Friday night—when I’d humiliated her, and she’d punched my friend, Madoc, in the face—must have been a one-time deal.
“Is that what you’re wearing on the plane?” I asked, sneering.
I should’ve just walked away, but hell, I couldn’t stop engaging her. It was an addiction.
She turned back to me, her fingers fisting up. “Why do you ask?”
“Just looks a little sloppy is all.” But that was a bold-faced lie.
The black T-shirt was worn out, but it clung to her fit body like it was made just for her, and her dark jeans hugged her ass, telling me exactly what she would look like naked. With long, shiny hair and flawless skin, she looked like fire and sugar, and I wanted to gorge and burn at the same time.
Tatum was hot, but she didn’t know it.
And blonde or not, that was my type.
“But no worries,” I continued. “I get it.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Get what?”
Leaning in, I taunted her with a smug grin. “You always liked wearing my clothes.”
Her eyes widened, and with her flushed skin there was no mistaking that she was pissed. It was raging all over her tough little face.
And I smiled to myself, because I fucking loved it.
She didn’t run away, though.
“Hold on.” She held up her pointer finger and turned to walk to the truck.
Digging under the front seat, in the emergency pack her dad kept there, she fished out something and slammed the car door shut. By the time she’d huffed back over to me, I saw that she had a lighter in her hand.
Before I could even register what was happening, she’d peeled off her shirt and exposed her perfect chest in a sexy ass sports bra.
My heart damn near shifted with the fucking pounding in my chest.
I watched, not breathing, as she held up the shirt, flicked the lighter, and dipped the hem into the flame, bringing it to ash piece by piece.
Son of a bitch! What the hell was happening with her all of a sudden?
My gaze flashed to hers, and time stood still as we watched each other, forgetting the flaming material between us. Her hair danced around her body, and her storm-filled eyes pierced my skin, my brain, and my ability to move or speak.
Her arms shook a little, and her breaths, although steady, were deep. She was nervous as hell.
Penelope Douglas is a writer and teacher in Las Vegas. Born in Dubuque, Iowa, she is the oldest of five children. Penelope attended the University of Northern Iowa, earning a Bachelor's degree in Public Administration, because her father told her to "just get the degree!" She then earned a Masters of Science in Education at Loyola University in New Orleans, because she hated Public Administration. One night, she got tipsy and told the bouncer at the bar where she worked that his son was hot, and three years later they were married. To the son, not the bouncer. They have spawn, but just one. A daughter named Aydan. Penelope loves sweets, the show Sons of Anarchy, and she shops at Target almost daily.
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